I want to share a little on the topic of intimacy today, because it is something that is continually challenging to me. I am now and engaged man, and having been in a relationship for only a short period of time (compared to what I hope it will be), I can already see how much intimacy is vital, and yet painful.
If I desire intimacy, I cannot run away. I cannot disengage. It means that if there is a problem, or if something hurts, I no longer have the option to run away or avoid it. When I was single, it was very possible, but suddenly, I am now accountable to someone. How ridiculous would my relationship be if Dieuwke was always chasing me around so that I would talk to her, or deal with anything.
It's almost impossible to get closer, and to deal with a problem, if one side decides not to engage.
Trying to teach a student who is not listening, is about the same as talking to a brick wall. (As my mum would voice to me when I was playing video games, I was a one-track mind, especially when one provided explosions and sounds and the other involved cleaning...)
To say that we want intimacy means we will pursue. It means we allow ourselves to be caught.
This reminds me of the language in the Psalms, where the Psalmists continually use both metaphor and plain language in describing a heart that is yearning for God.
King David chased after God. Not only that, but God chased after him! And because David had intimacy with God as his highest desire he allowed himself to be caught by the the Father.
When intimacy is our highest goal, things begin to look differently, it's no longer about who was right, but about how can I show love and receive love? Yes there are fights, there a conflicts, but the main goal has changed from being right, to showing honour.
In our relationship with God, is our goal intimacy, or is it a transaction?
To be honest, I don't desire intimacy with the cashier at woolworths. I would rather just pay for my items and leave. We did business, you got what you wanted and I got what I wanted. Intimacy is not a part of this transaction. In fact the very word transaction shows us that it's not so much about love, but service.
Now God desires service, to ignore this is to ignore a large part of scripture, yet the revelation that we see in the Father's heart. In Jesus dealing with the disciples is not a transaction. You give me obedience, I get you into heaven. God gets his worship and praise, and we get to live. Is this not the way the world sees God? Yet I ask how many of us conduct ourselves in the same way?
I will go to church, I will read the bible worship, cry, dance so that I get from God what I want or need.
What if God has already given it to you? And what he desires is that we give to him, not because of what we get, but because of our love.
That if intimacy with us is God's desire, he cares more about our willingness to engage with him, that to be in 'right standing' with Him. After all, what is right-standing with God but faith in Jesus, faith in His gifts, His generosity and His love for us?
Does God require servants or sons? Both, yet the highest of these is to be a son. After all, robots are much simpler to create, I doubt he would have experienced as much pain that way, but he created us. With thoughts, feelings, and choices.
The choice to run away, or to come closer?
The choice is yours.
Daniel